Are you living your life your way?

  • 0%Yes

  • 0%No way- I need help

  • 0%No idea what I want. Help me

You think you’re on the right path but somehow you feel lost. You think you’re

doing your best. And you probably are, but deep inside you hear a little voice crying to get out. You try to silence it but you can still hear it.

Your loved ones want the best for you.

Since you were a child your parents had their own dreams about what you will become, who you’ll choose to love, and how you will live your life.

That’s lovely when it works favorably, but sometimes it doesn’t work at all, and suddenly you feel lost and confused. You’ve lost your dreams, desires, and vision of the life you wanted. 

Caring about what other people want for you can cause you to live to fulfill their desires and forget about your own.

Happiness cannot happen if you don’t live your truth. It may cause mistakes, failure, and regrets but it will also bring lessons, wisdom, and personal harmony. If you don’t live your truth, you will become angry, resentful, and end up in a life that doesn’t suit you. But of course, it’s not easy to just be true to who you are.

Finding your inner truth is a process that takes time. And sometimes it takes a very long time. You have to work to pay the bills, but while you are being responsible, try to be true to that voice inside you.

When you discover the true you, AHA! happens; you know what you want and are free to go after it with every ounce of your being. When you do, you live contently—comfortable in your own skin—able to achieve whatever impossible dreams you had imagined for yourself.

Listening to your inner voice is a skill. It’s a journey that doesn’t happen overnight. It’s about tuning in to your deeper self and tuning out the noise that is disrupting your own voice. It’s a daily practice of trial and error. Sometimes you have to change the direction you were headed in, make a u-turn, and go back again before you can move forward. It’s about falling down, getting hurt, brushing yourself off, and getting up again and again.

1. Journaling

The idea of writing in a journal might seem spectacularly unhelpful for depression. You want to get away from negative thoughts, not wallow in them further.

Decide how long you’ll write in your journal each day. Then, set a timer for half that time. Vent your frustrations and distress until the timer goes off, then write about more positive and meaningful experiences.

Get your negative thoughts out. Then, aim to fill the same amount of space (whether that’s 10 lines, half a page, or one full page) by recording positive experiences, or challenging and reframing those negative thoughts.

2. Practice positive self-talk

The self-critical and self-defeating thoughts that often accompany depression can feel impossible to escape. Maybe they play on a loop — a track permanently set to repeat that you can’t seem to switch off. But this is depression talking, and depression often lies.

Revising the way you talk to yourself is an essential self-care tip for depression.

Try breaking down the negative thoughts:

Identify the thought.

Consider whether you have any proof to back up that thought. What evidence might counter it instead?

Get more insight by exploring cognitive distortions, like all-or-nothing thinking, mind reading, or overgeneralization.

Ask yourself if you’d say the same thing to a friend. No? What would you say instead?

Then, try slowly mixing positivity into your internal dialogue:

Aim to focus on everyday humorous and lighthearted moments instead of the darker ones.

When you find yourself fixating on flaws, remind yourself of your strengths and positive qualities.

Accept praise and compliments instead of brushing them aside.

3. Mindfulness

Practicing mindfulness can help you tune into your emotions, making it easier to recognize distressing thoughts and feelings as mere thoughts — not reality.

Mindfulness also helps you stay present and engaged in your day-to-day life, so you’ll be more aware of pleasurable moments and sensations.

Consider these quick steps to enhance mindfulness:

  • Do one thing at a time. Devote all of your senses to that activity.

  • Take a nature break. Sit outside and experience the world with all of your senses.

  • When negative thoughts surface, sit with them briefly before reacting or responding.

  • Try meditation.

  • Work with a therapist who offers mindfulness-based cognitive therapy.

Progressing In the New World

(Chapter 1 of I Needed A Hero So I Became One)

Well, there's this motivational line I read on some social media platform, "when life gives you lemons, turn them into lemonade and enjoy." I guess I got a whole field of lemons from life, and all I could do was make lemonade; why? Because in a situation like this, where you've already escaped a war, unharmed and your body fully intact, you know there's nothing worse coming at you. You're already prepped up to take any difficulty head-on, and that's what you must be doing when survival is at stake – quitting, weeping, and succumbing to the problems of life isn't an option. When it came to you, the difficulty, no matter how monolithic it was, was always miniature compared to your will and your capacity to survive. Hit that shot, make it big,

I started conquering one barrier at a time, it was difficult, but life never gave it to you in a silver platter, if you want it, you batter giddy-up for a trot through the swamps, a ride through the thorns and vanquish the course that's set for you – no complains. To begin with, I started with the linguistic barrier; everyday communication had to be made accessible; enrolled in high school, I had realized on the very first day, if I wanted to shine, I had to learn the language. This is how I'll put it; being a teen was hard enough, and not communicating was harder. Silence won't get me anywhere. Got myself enrolled in an English language course and aced it. Made it through, and why not? I was the sharper one and saw my dad struggling through daily life.

While in the course, the benefits started unraveling; I was participative and quickly learned what was being taught. Well, on a lighter note, my most challenging subjects were history and science, so all those who find it hard with them, I guess they're actually quite tricky, and it's not a problem with us.

A few months into high school, I started making progress, writing essays, going for co-curricular activities, and guess what, I had progressed enough to create an International Club too.

Language barrier – handled.

A lot of stuff got handled the moment I knew how to communicate. My high school studies became more manageable, and I moved on, maybe further than I could have done back in my homeland. I chose volleyball and tennis as my friends to energize me after the hassle. And it really did work for me; all the toll that studies and your errands have on you can miraculously deplete if you have a recreational activity scheduled.

Everything was tremendously toiling, I had already started volunteering for the elderly, helping them with their routine, helping at the City Hall and charity work with Catholic Charities, the Big Sister, Big Brother group sessions and activities; in short, accomplishments were flowing in well.

But how was it possible? One thing that's a life lesson; giving back to society, helping others in the community, and trying to make a difference for others is what does wonders for you.


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